Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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