Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
