Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
worst night to have a conscience
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
