Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
