i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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