If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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