i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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