WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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