I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
