I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
