so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
