this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
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