I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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