My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
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