so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I want to be your penis for a week.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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