Bisexual people are plain selfish.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
