i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
