My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Boobs are out for the taking
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
