I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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