He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
