what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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