Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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