Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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