I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
