I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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