He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
