It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
