Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
