worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
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