I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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