He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
