Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Operation Purity has been aborted
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Randomize
