My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
this boner is exhausting
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize
