This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Terrible idea I love it
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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