I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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