What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I see more hoeing in ur future
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