My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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