CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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