it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
My bed smells like the plague
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
