Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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