Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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