yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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