Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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