i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize
