let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
