well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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