she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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