Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
