well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
