everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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